It’s beginning to feel a lot like… STRESS!

Stress is our brain’s way of dealing with any demand. Simple things, such as watching a scary movie, riding a rollercoaster, and a fifteen minute car ride to work in the morning can bring on change, which in turn, can trigger an increase in our stress levels. Now, imagine your holidays. The turkey needs to be cooked; the kids are off from school (a blessing to them, a potential nightmare to you –as much as you adore your children). Grandma and grandpa are on their way and the house still needs to be vacuumed. Ahhhh! The “to-do” list can seem endless during the holidays and if you’re not careful, negative emotions can easily become displaced onto those we love and care about (kind of like when you kick the dog after you’ve had a bad day at work because your boss yelled at you – well, let’s hope you don’t really kick your dog).

It’s not just our rageful releases towards others that can be harmful. Stress has distinct and harmful physiological effects as well. Everyone handles stressors differently. The immediate results of stress can be increased blood pressure, rapid breathing (which can feel like a panic attack), a raise in your heart rate, muscles becoming tense, and you can feel a heightened level of alertness. The more long-term effects can be: digestive problems, headaches, sleeplessness, depressed mood, anger and irritability, and heightened anxiety. When you experience stress you are more prone to frequent and severe infections, (*sniffle, sniffle, cough, cough), and vaccines can even become less effective.

So what can you do to achieve a happier, healthier and stable “you” throughout the holidays and avoid stabbing the turkey repeatedly (while no one else is looking of course)? Here are some tips on how to better manage those unwanted stress levels:

• Phone-a-friend! Don’t be afraid to utilize the close social network you have in your life (no, not Facebook). Sometimes just venting to a family member or friend can provide relief.
• Prioritize! Remember that the holidays are about spending time with those you care about and love. It’s not about making sure you out-shop everyone else on black Friday, or that the mashed potatoes aren’t lumpy (I promise, even if people do notice, they won’t care after they awaken from their food coma).
• Spa Time Anyone? Scheduling time for restful and relaxing activities is important (and not just during the holidays). Guys, it doesn’t have to be the spa, get out of the house and look at some tools! Ladies go get your nails done! Or, call in that favor to your friends to watch the little ones, and go get a couples massage.
• Stay Positive and Recognize What Accomplishments You Have Achieved! Too often we criticize ourselves and rarely do we lift our arm up, turn it around and pat ourselves on the back. You are an amazing person, and you should give yourself some credit for who you are more than just once or twice a year.
• Exercise! Did you know that 30 minutes of exercise a day (even just walking) is correlated to a decrease in stress and anxiety?
• Assertiveness! You don’t have to say yes to every request made by others. It’s really ok to say no.
• Caffeine Cutback! It may seem ludicrous to cutback on what you think is the only thing helping you to get through your list of errands, but the truth is, the more caffeine you ingest, the more on edge you will feel.
• And As Mr. Miyagi told the Karate Kid (Part II), “when life is out of balance one must always remember, to…BREATHE (not to pray as Danielson so sarcastically commented [although prayer, very much like mediation, can help])”. You would be surprised what a few deep breaths can do to relax your mental state and help collect your thoughts. I keep a bowl of un-inflated balloons in my office. Every time anyone is stressed out I have them blow up a balloon. It helps you to breathe deeply, and it’s fun, I mean c’mon, it’s a balloon!

Finally, make sure you are able to recognize the signs that your body is reacting in a negative way to stress. If you start to experience difficulty sleeping, find you are having to use substances like drugs or alcohol to cope, are easily angered, depressed, anxious and having low energy then it’s probably time to seek assistance from a mental health provider (someone like myself), especially if you feel you’re having suicidal thoughts. If you having difficulty reaching out to a psychotherapist because it’s “therapy”, maybe a simple change in your perception is in order. Just like there are personal trainers at the gym that help you achieve better physical fitness, think of a mental health professional as a mental health trainer, here to assist you in achieving better mental fitness.

So, take a deeeep breath, relax, and enjoy your holidays!